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Timetravellingwithoutmoving

Thu Apr 2, 2009, 8:53 AM
So.. yesterday, unable to sleep decided I wanted to check my old drawings and paintings for some reason, and this nostalgia kicked in unexpectedly in just a few seconds after looking at them.

They were better, I was better, which makes me think.. wasn't I supposed to be improving? I mean yeah.. there are probably some things I did improve... I can probably draw a body less imperfect than before... But I did perspectives! poses! people! cartoons! you name it!, I didn't get stuck in this endless spiral of same shit everyday.

So yeah, call it whatever you want, EMOtional, sensitive, nostalgic or just down in a box. But I want and have this feeling that I need to get it back, somehow. Of course, there are lots of different circumstances that made me lose it in the first place.

Job, time, internet, compromises and one thing that I am not too proud to say.. depression.

Why is it that when you're depressed, this rush of emotions flow onto you naturally, makes you want to write, draw, channel everything into a piece of paper.

So.. now that I am somewhat happy bout my life and what I have in it, I won't be able to fulfill what I love so much? art? if that's the name you'd rather call it.

Well Fuck it!, I guess that's the conclusion of my long and boring rambling

An inspired heartfelt and shocking "FUCK IT!"

PS: I'll probably upload a couple of those when I have the time so you can see I'm just not rambling stuff

  • Mood: Fear
  • Listening to: Black ♥ Inertia
  • Reading: Old lyrics
  • Watching: idk.. gossip girl?
  • Playing: Fallout 3
  • Eating: an aspiring depression
  • Drinking: nostalgia with my lungs

Devious Comments

love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconlilpip:
te entiendo. Yo también siento que me estoy perdiendo. Y cuando hago un dibujo digo "fuck! hace dos años hubiera hecho esto con los ojos cerrados, y ahora borro y delineo y borro y delineo. No me gusta." Y ese 'no me gusta' es como un hachazo auto-inflingido al ego.

Todos hemos perdido nuestra musa en algún momento. A lo mejor la volvamos a conquistar pronto... a lo mejor no. Creo que la depresión no era su musa, es solo la excusa.

(lol, la rima no fue intencional)

--
:peace: Palestina Libre :peace:
:iconmyanima:
Y uno se encierra! se encierra feo.. ese "no me gusta" me limita y hace que lo bote y no vuelva a intentarlo.. Algo que hace años yo hubiera dicho.. ni picha.. lo hago por que lo hago por que si no lo hago no mejoro!

Musa o excusa, lo lograba :\

--
I don't wanna be lonely, I just wanna be alone

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